I remember when I broke up with my boyfriend of seven years. It seemed like everyone that I came into contact with knew about it and started giving me love advice. You wouldn't believe some of the things I was told to do! The advice ranged from stalking my ex so that he doesn't forget about me to sleeping with his best friend to get back at him. Thankfully, I was smart enough not to follow these well meaning advisors. But I did wonder to myself, how many people do follow this advice? How do you know which is the right love advice to follow?
So I did some research and found out that the best love advice comes from those who have been there and done that. The people that have lost the love of their life and used psychological techniques to get their ex back. These people will be able to give you sound advice on what to do and what not to do. One of the things you shouldn't do is blame yourself.
It is easy when you go through a breakup to blame yourself. You will imagine that there is something horribly wrong with you and that is why he left. But unless you are truly a psycho, chances are the relationship went sour for other reasons.
People that are in a relationship for a long period of time get comfortable with one another. They stop dressing to impress. Romance is no longer something that is a top priority. They take each other for granted. After a period of time, the grass starts to look a little greener on the other side. Before you know it the relationship has gone downhill and a breakup is inevitable.
So when this happens and when you realize that your ex is the right person for you, then you need solid love advice that you know will work for you. Don't listen to your well meaning friends and family members. Get your love advice from the ones who have made it their passion in life to help others get their ex back.
This advice will be more than just helping you to get your ex back. It will also help you to understand yourself and help you to correct the mistakes that you have made in the relationship so that history doesn't repeat itself. With the right love advice you can have a strong, loving relationship with that special person that can last a lifetime.
Senin, 22 Juni 2009
Kamis, 18 Juni 2009
18 Love Letter Benefits
It is amazing that such a simple gesture as writing a love letter could have such a profound impact on you and your true love. Not to mention on all those watching you, observing your commitment to love.
What's more, writing frequent love letters
1. Builds excitement that's not easily quenched. Each letter when prepared with care is like a surprise gift, tucked behind the couch just out of sight that appeared out of nowhere on Christmas morning.
2. Instills a joy that can endure the storms of life and that can even place an upward curve on sweet lips that have been crying all day. A couple heartfelt words on a sheet of paper can work wonders.
3. Recovers happiness lost during the clutter of busy days, screaming kids, yelling bosses, traffic jams, spilled coffee or whatever the crazy episode of the day happened to be. All the worries of the day melt away when you know someone loves you no matter what!
4. Creates hope even where hope never existed. A word of encouragement - a simple "I support you," "We'll get there together," or "You can do it!" in a romantic love letter can make you a believer.
5. Produces a forgiving spirit out of your commitment to write frequent love letters - a habit that will result in a desire to keep your relationship pure and free from bitterness and grudges.
6. Encourages communication that results in a closer more intimate relationship; more meaningful conversations, more talking, joking and more laughing.
7. Stirs passions resulting in more nights out together, more flowers with a note two pages long, more mornings with breakfast in bed and more hugs and kisses with no prompting whatsoever.
8. Cultivates trust and commitment that keeps growing stronger as you establish this excellent habit - writing frequent love letters.
9. Promotes romance... more alone time, more tenderness, more compassion, more concern, more fun and more tiny surprises for no reason at all.
10. Discourages destructive behavior by filling your heart and mind with love, tenderness and compassion; leaving little and eventually no room for anything bad.
11. Relieves stress by helping you to relax, laugh and maybe even cry happy tears. A love letter takes your mind off your troubles, if even just for a few moments.
12. Reduces fighting and tension by replacing those horrible, kill-joy, stress-creating parts of every relationship with patient loving conservations, prompted by a love letter. Who wouldn't want to reduce or even eliminate, if at all possible, fighting and tension?
13. Abolishes sadness with a few genuine words like "I love you," "I'm here" or "Just wait until you see..." - words that can change your mood instantaneously. Telling them you love them, sharing a happy note or hinting to a fun surprise works every time.
14. Eradicates loneliness with communication that's sincere and hard to challenge. Commitment to sharing deep thoughts, concerns, worries, hopes and dreams can only result in a closer relationship and not one that's more distant.
15. Dissolves boredom because writing and reading love letters is a fun and exciting activity that never gets old. You can easily spend a lifetime pursuing your lover's ever-changing wants, needs and desires.
16. Sets a good example for all those around you who are watching you and your commitment to love. Your friends, relatives, neighbors and children are watching you. This is your chance to be a good role model. As it's been well said,
... good character is caught, not taught.
17. Endorses faithfulness by filling your heart, mind and soul with love for your one and only true love. And by committing to keep filling your heart, mind and soul with things lovely and good.
18. Deters deceit because it is hard to genuinely move in two separate directions at the same time. Perhaps some can, but even so, writing frequent love letters with words of love, compassion, hope, joy and happiness will eventually tug on the conscience, suggesting change.
What's more, writing frequent love letters
1. Builds excitement that's not easily quenched. Each letter when prepared with care is like a surprise gift, tucked behind the couch just out of sight that appeared out of nowhere on Christmas morning.
2. Instills a joy that can endure the storms of life and that can even place an upward curve on sweet lips that have been crying all day. A couple heartfelt words on a sheet of paper can work wonders.
3. Recovers happiness lost during the clutter of busy days, screaming kids, yelling bosses, traffic jams, spilled coffee or whatever the crazy episode of the day happened to be. All the worries of the day melt away when you know someone loves you no matter what!
4. Creates hope even where hope never existed. A word of encouragement - a simple "I support you," "We'll get there together," or "You can do it!" in a romantic love letter can make you a believer.
5. Produces a forgiving spirit out of your commitment to write frequent love letters - a habit that will result in a desire to keep your relationship pure and free from bitterness and grudges.
6. Encourages communication that results in a closer more intimate relationship; more meaningful conversations, more talking, joking and more laughing.
7. Stirs passions resulting in more nights out together, more flowers with a note two pages long, more mornings with breakfast in bed and more hugs and kisses with no prompting whatsoever.
8. Cultivates trust and commitment that keeps growing stronger as you establish this excellent habit - writing frequent love letters.
9. Promotes romance... more alone time, more tenderness, more compassion, more concern, more fun and more tiny surprises for no reason at all.
10. Discourages destructive behavior by filling your heart and mind with love, tenderness and compassion; leaving little and eventually no room for anything bad.
11. Relieves stress by helping you to relax, laugh and maybe even cry happy tears. A love letter takes your mind off your troubles, if even just for a few moments.
12. Reduces fighting and tension by replacing those horrible, kill-joy, stress-creating parts of every relationship with patient loving conservations, prompted by a love letter. Who wouldn't want to reduce or even eliminate, if at all possible, fighting and tension?
13. Abolishes sadness with a few genuine words like "I love you," "I'm here" or "Just wait until you see..." - words that can change your mood instantaneously. Telling them you love them, sharing a happy note or hinting to a fun surprise works every time.
14. Eradicates loneliness with communication that's sincere and hard to challenge. Commitment to sharing deep thoughts, concerns, worries, hopes and dreams can only result in a closer relationship and not one that's more distant.
15. Dissolves boredom because writing and reading love letters is a fun and exciting activity that never gets old. You can easily spend a lifetime pursuing your lover's ever-changing wants, needs and desires.
16. Sets a good example for all those around you who are watching you and your commitment to love. Your friends, relatives, neighbors and children are watching you. This is your chance to be a good role model. As it's been well said,
... good character is caught, not taught.
17. Endorses faithfulness by filling your heart, mind and soul with love for your one and only true love. And by committing to keep filling your heart, mind and soul with things lovely and good.
18. Deters deceit because it is hard to genuinely move in two separate directions at the same time. Perhaps some can, but even so, writing frequent love letters with words of love, compassion, hope, joy and happiness will eventually tug on the conscience, suggesting change.
Senin, 15 Juni 2009
Is There Unconditional Love? Love Conditionally
As much as people say love ends when you start having conditionals, i think otherwise. Actually, love ends when you stop having conditionals. Does it make sense, think about it. Once you stop meeting your partners conditions, like being home in time and doing things they like, the love between the two of you flies out of the window. Now isn't that conditional love? The only love that we can say is never conditional is parental love. No matter what your child does, you will still love it. Unconditional love is one where you love someone without looking at the things they do, where they come from or how they look like. Only then can you say to have unconditional love.
Many people before they get into a relationship make a list of things they would want their partner to have. For the girls the list could include, a car, a house, a nice phone and handsome and all this should be in one person. Without this, they cannot love the person. Without realizing it, they have already put conditions for their love and it ceases being unconditional love. They would rather be with a rich handsome guy who has houses all over the country than be with a poor man. Though the poor guy would have loved them better they cannot be with him. There are some ladies who say they would rather be in a limousine and cry rather than be with a poor man and smiling. Who wants to worry about money anyway, they reason. For the men, they want a submissive person, intelligent and beautiful. Isn't that conditional?
It is also generally believe that a poor person will more likely cheat on you than a rich guy. This is because most rich guys are too busy to have multiple relationship while the poor guy has all the time in the world. They would also make passes at women just to prove their manhood. With the many conditions that we give our partners, regarding the time they should get home and what they should do and not do we cannot say unconditional love exists. We might hide behind being concerned but that is not being concerned. The question is, if you are simply concerned about the person, why then do you get mad with them to the extent of ending the relationship? If you loved the person so much and what you had for them is unconditional love you wouldn't want to terminate the relationship for whatever reason.
Many people before they get into a relationship make a list of things they would want their partner to have. For the girls the list could include, a car, a house, a nice phone and handsome and all this should be in one person. Without this, they cannot love the person. Without realizing it, they have already put conditions for their love and it ceases being unconditional love. They would rather be with a rich handsome guy who has houses all over the country than be with a poor man. Though the poor guy would have loved them better they cannot be with him. There are some ladies who say they would rather be in a limousine and cry rather than be with a poor man and smiling. Who wants to worry about money anyway, they reason. For the men, they want a submissive person, intelligent and beautiful. Isn't that conditional?
It is also generally believe that a poor person will more likely cheat on you than a rich guy. This is because most rich guys are too busy to have multiple relationship while the poor guy has all the time in the world. They would also make passes at women just to prove their manhood. With the many conditions that we give our partners, regarding the time they should get home and what they should do and not do we cannot say unconditional love exists. We might hide behind being concerned but that is not being concerned. The question is, if you are simply concerned about the person, why then do you get mad with them to the extent of ending the relationship? If you loved the person so much and what you had for them is unconditional love you wouldn't want to terminate the relationship for whatever reason.
Jumat, 12 Juni 2009
Selasa, 09 Juni 2009
Sabtu, 06 Juni 2009
Rabu, 03 Juni 2009
Un-premeditated Test of Love - Would You Love Him Still?
Every family struggles with hard times, broken promises, unmet expectations, financial setbacks and betrayal. When you face such difficulties, call on God's strength so that you and your partner can walk through the pain together and emerge the stronger for it; just like Ben and Maurine.
After twenty - three years in career, Ben was worn out, exhausted from trying to climb the corporate ladder. One morning he happened to catch a television infomercial that promised him all the luxuries of life if he would just attend an upcoming seminar and was promptly overwhelmed with the potential of the program as he watched the video and studied the brochures. He and Maurine had always discussed any expenditure over one hundred dollar. But that day, he caved in to his greed and withdrew all their savings as well as cashed in their retirement fund to invest in this get - rich - quick enterprise. It was such a sure thing. It had worked for so many.
Months later Ben's life was one huge mess. He had quit his job, believing that if he devoted all his time to this new venture, he would surely reap the rich rewards the videos and glossy brochures promised. Unfortunately, that's not what happened. He was out of a job, their credit cards were maxed out, and Maurine had to go back to work full - time for the first time since before they'd had children.
Despite all this, Maurine did not give up on her husband. When she discussed her fear and anger and frustration with her pastor, he told her "Maurine, you've come smack up against one of those 'in sickness or in health' realities. But you are called to love Ben even if ... That's the kind of Love Christ exhibits for us - agape love. It's a real thing Maurine admits come solely come from God, she took her pastor's words to heart.
And Ben responded. He found a new job with a Christian employer and the nature of the work made him feel truly useful for the first time in years. He and Maurine downsized their home, sold their boat, and made serious inroads into paying off their creditors. Ben replaced his desire to get rich quick with a renewed vision and commitment to live and finish life well.
After twenty - three years in career, Ben was worn out, exhausted from trying to climb the corporate ladder. One morning he happened to catch a television infomercial that promised him all the luxuries of life if he would just attend an upcoming seminar and was promptly overwhelmed with the potential of the program as he watched the video and studied the brochures. He and Maurine had always discussed any expenditure over one hundred dollar. But that day, he caved in to his greed and withdrew all their savings as well as cashed in their retirement fund to invest in this get - rich - quick enterprise. It was such a sure thing. It had worked for so many.
Months later Ben's life was one huge mess. He had quit his job, believing that if he devoted all his time to this new venture, he would surely reap the rich rewards the videos and glossy brochures promised. Unfortunately, that's not what happened. He was out of a job, their credit cards were maxed out, and Maurine had to go back to work full - time for the first time since before they'd had children.
Despite all this, Maurine did not give up on her husband. When she discussed her fear and anger and frustration with her pastor, he told her "Maurine, you've come smack up against one of those 'in sickness or in health' realities. But you are called to love Ben even if ... That's the kind of Love Christ exhibits for us - agape love. It's a real thing Maurine admits come solely come from God, she took her pastor's words to heart.
And Ben responded. He found a new job with a Christian employer and the nature of the work made him feel truly useful for the first time in years. He and Maurine downsized their home, sold their boat, and made serious inroads into paying off their creditors. Ben replaced his desire to get rich quick with a renewed vision and commitment to live and finish life well.
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